Thursday, 12 June 2008

• How can I forgive?

  Sorry, I must first admit … I am a sycophant.  I draw my inspiration in a large part form the impetus of others. So, many times, what I have to say is reaction instead of pro-action. It’s not that I can’t think for myself. Possibly, it’s because I am striving to have a dialogue rather than a monologue. So, in a sense, my entries are actually really long comments and personal observations to others very competent and inspiring posts.

  Miss marigold wrote about, A Lesson on Forgiveness, and asked, “Do you have a hard time forgiving the people who hurt you?” The simple answer is, yes…very difficult. I came to Christ later in life than most. My natural inclination before Christ was very Old Testament, an Eye for an Eye. (I may not have belonged to Christ but I did attend on of ‘His’ churches) Let me assure you there were times when I was up to my arm pits in eyeballs. I made sure that each got their own back in spades. Then, I came to Christ and realized that although eye plucking was still in the Bible; Jesus had added the rest of the story to that truth, so to say.

  Mat 5:38  You know that you have been taught, "An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth."

  Mat 5:39  But I tell you not to try to get even with a person who has done something to you. When someone slaps your right cheek, turn and let that person slap your other cheek.

  Mat 5:40  If someone sues you for your shirt, give up your coat as well.

  Mat 5:41  If a soldier forces you to carry his pack one mile, carry it two miles.

  Mat 5:42  When people ask you for something, give it to them. When they want to borrow money, lend it to them.

  Mat 5:43  You have heard people say, "Love your neighbors and hate your enemies."

  Mat 5:44  But I tell you to love your enemies and pray for anyone who mistreats you.

  Mat 5:45  Then you will be acting like your Father in heaven. He makes the sun rise on both good and bad people. And he sends rain for the ones who do right and for the ones who do wrong.

  Mat 5:46  If you love only those people who love you, will God reward you for that? Even tax collectors love their friends.

  Mat 5:47  If you greet only your friends, what's so great about that? Don't even unbelievers do that?

  Mat 5:48  But you must always act like your Father in heaven.  (CEV)

  This was then a dilemma for me. Surely they still deserved to suffer a little if they had made me suffer? Again the natural man in me demanded retribution. So after a while I found a passage in Romans that made me feel better, if you are willing to accept smug and self righteous as Christ like.  Apparently you can force the Bible to mean whatever you want if you are willing to search and then take what you find and twist and turn it until the true meaning is lost, taken out of context or ignored altogether. So, I had thought I had found my answer by setting my personal bulldog on the offender.

  Rom 12:17  Don't mistreat someone who has mistreated you. But try to earn the respect of others,

  Rom 12:18  and do your best to live at peace with everyone.

  Rom 12:19  Dear friends, don't try to get even. Let God take revenge. In the Scriptures the Lord says, "I am the one to take revenge and pay them back."

  Rom 12:20  The Scriptures also say, "If your enemies are hungry, give them something to eat. And if they are thirsty, give them something to drink. This will be the same as piling burning coals on their heads."

  Rom 12:21  Don't let evil defeat you, but defeat evil with good.   (CEV)

  I simply ignored vs. 17 and 18 and plunged right in at Let God take revenge…. Great, I thought. I can still “act” nice and let God slam them. But it never worked out that way. Why? Because my attitude was still wrong, my motives were deceitful and I still had not learned to forgive. And I did not have peace. It wasn’t until sometime later that I finally understood what Jesus had been trying to teach me. Revenge, or evening the score, should not even enter my mind. In fact, he has been teaching me to let go of the hurts before they grow into offenses. He is teaching me to have compassion to a point where I allow a person to be hurtful without it being hurtful. Paradoxical in a way.

  Jam 1:19  My dear friends, you should be quick to listen and slow to speak or to get angry.

  For me, the first and best response is to not take offense so easily. I have begun to accept the fact that I no longer have the luxury of being ‘right’ all the time. I’ve learned that not every action requires a response. I’m learning to be silent.

  Secondly, I have come to realize that not everything will be my way. It’s really very much the same lesson we try to teach our children when they are young. Namely….Life isn’t fair, Johnny. Suzy gets a new pair of shoes, you don’t. Life is not self leveling…there will always be occasions when we feel, it’s just not fair.

  Mat 5:45b   He (your Father in Heaven) makes the sun rise on both good and bad people. And he sends rain for the ones who do right and for the ones who do wrong. (CEV)

  Thirdly, sometimes, the best I can do is to forgive simply because my Father in Heaven wants me to…because I certainly would not do so on my own and many times would be completely unable to without His help, because Abba my Father loves me and wants me to obey Him in faith…because I love Him.

  Is it easy to forgive? The answer remains. NO! Everyday I still struggle. Everyday His word reminds me of the peace I will find when I truly forgive from the heart and not just from the head, according to His will and not my motives.

   (Ps 103:12) He separates my sin as far as the east is from the west.

  “From one nail scarred hand to the other.”

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